You start dying

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You start dying slowly
if you do not travel,
if you do not read,
If you do not listen to the sounds of life,
If you do not appreciate yourself.

You start dying slowly
When you kill your self-esteem;
When you do not let others help you.

You start dying slowly
If you become a slave of your habits,
Walking everyday on the same paths...
If you do not change your routine,
If you do not wear different colours
Or you do not speak to those you don't know.

You start dying slowly
If you avoid to feel passion
And their turbulent emotions;
Those which make your eyes glisten
And your heart beat fast.

You start dying slowly
If you do not change your life when you are not satisfied with your job, or with your love,
If you do not risk what is safe for the uncertain,
If you do not go after a dream,
If you do not allow yourself,
At least once in your lifetime,
To run away from sensible advice..."

Pablo Neruda

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover...

Life is taking a turn.  We told the children about our decision to divorce. Contrary to what my husband was expecting, there was no drama.  The children were relieved.  The atmosphere became breathable again.  I took a whole week away from home (see my latest HNT). I had the pleasure to meet each of my children for lunch and get their feedback and thoughts.  It looks like their dear father is not that ideal after all, which in some way comforts me.  I'm not the only bad guy in the story. 


During that time alone, I allowed myself some reflection and I came to the conclusion that I was doing the best thing for everyone, including my husband.  Yet, when I came home to discover the house had undergone a post-nuclear war treatment and that he had moved to the basement, I could not prevent tears from welling up.  Over 20 years of common life, sharing the same bed, waking up in each other's arms or at least cuddling or just being there.  The very bed where all three children have been conceived. Now it is over,  like something is missing...  This is what I wanted, this is what I was thriving for, what I have inflicted on my husband, it is brutal even if I was longing for it.  I can see the pain in his eyes, he feels so helpless...

 I believe that what we get out of life is what we’ve set ourselves up to get, so there’s no such thing as an inconsequential decision. Our destinies are the culmination of all the choices we’ve made along the way, which is why it’s imperative to listen hard to your inner voice when it speaks up. Don’t let anyone else’s noise drown it out.– Megan McCafferty

Don’t let the mistakes and disappointments of the past control and direct your future. – Zig Ziglar

About all you can do in life is be who you are. Some people will love you for you. Most will love you for what you can do for them, and some won’t like you at all. – Rita Mae Brown

You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.– C.S. Lewis

Men enjoy being thought of as hunters, but are generally too lazy to hunt. Women, on the other hand, love to hunt, but would rather nobody knew it– ~ Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, 1966

Freedom (n.): To ask nothing. To expect nothing. To depend on nothing. -Ayn Rand

Maybe it is time for me to go on a dating site?

Victory Dance

Dancing on the ceiling!

I just peeked in today to have a look at my blog. What a surprise! What a thrill! I am doing the victory dance, Wooo Wooo. I jump on my desk and fly to the top of my shelves and to the ceiling in an elegant, graceful Matrix-wise double salto, around the office ceiling. Can you see my footprints on the wall? Exhilarating!


Well, I am actually sillily grinning at my screen as the very dignified grown-up woman I am supposed to be


Today, I reached 32 followers! Just a couple of weeks ago, I had 21, still cannot believe it. Welcome everybody, enjoy the trip!